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Home page > Vaidya Atreya Smith > Jokes with doctors 8

Jokes with doctors 8

A woman and a baby were in Vaidya Kumar’s examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby’s first exam.
Vaidya Kumar arrived, examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed. "Breast-fed" she replied. "Well, strip down to your waist," the doctor ordered. She did. He pinched her nipples, then pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a detailed examination. Motioning to her to get dressed, he said, "No wonder this baby is underweight. You don’t have any milk." "I know," she said, "I’m his Grandma, but I’m glad I came."

Vaidya Kumar walks in to his clinic to find a guy leaning heavily against wall. He asks his assistant, "What’s with that guy over there by the wall?"
The assistant says, "Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. I couldn’t find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle of laxative."
Vaidya Kumar says, "You idiot! You can’t treat a cough with laxatives!"
The assistant says, "Oh yeah? Look at him, he’s afraid to cough!"

As a young doctor Vaidya Kumar did his part of his internship out in a small rural community to help the aging country doctor. The older Vaidya suggested the young one accompany him on his house calls so the community could become used to a new doctor.
At the first house a woman complained, "I’ve been a little sick to my stomach."
The older Vaidya said, "Well, you’ve probably been overdoing the fresh fruit. Why not cut back on the amount you’ve been eating and see if that doesn’t do the trick?"
As they left, Vaidya Kumar said, "You didn’t even examine that woman. How did you arrive at your diagnosis so quickly?" "I didn’t have to. You noticed I dropped my pen on the floor in there? When I bent over to pick it up, I noticed a half-dozen banana peels in the trash. That was what was probably making her sick." "Huh!," the younger doctor exclaimed, "pretty clever. I think I’ll try that at the next house."
Arriving at the next house, they spent several minutes talking with a younger woman. She complained that she just didn’t have the energy she once did. "I’m feeling terribly run down lately." "You’ve probably been doing too much work for the church," Vaidya Kumar told her. "Perhaps you should cut back a bit and see if that helps.
As they left, the elder Vaidya said, "Your diagnosis is almost certainly correct, but how did you arrive at it so fast?" "Well, just as you did at the last house, I dropped my pen and when I bent down to retrieve it, I noticed the preacher under the bed!"

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